Sony teases next-gen reveal
"I don't know whether it's for PS4 or the conference in Feb but I just want to take this opportunity to say that it has been too long. I am so excited I feel like a kid again waiting for the Megadrive, PS1 or Dreamcast. Whatever sides we pick and whatever we fight over in the future, right now in the build up I love you guys and I'm close to peeing myself on a daily basis. I love gaming, give me the future! Bring it on!"
Incontinence - one of the big features of next-gen gaming
Sony teases next-gen reveal
"I don't want to see charts detailing the ups and downs. I don't want any talk about how many polygons it can show on the screen every 0.3 seconds. I don't want CGI game footage. I don't want talk of getting a few jobs to pay for it. And I don't want a goddamn LittleBigPlanet game for it even hinted at! Gimme a release date, an actual price, some pretty games actually running on the thing and a strawberry Chupa Chup."
- Queen Skillage
Zool remake on PS4 confirmed?
Microsoft 'to axe XNA'
"But where else will I be able to buy pregnancy simulators and psychotic dating games?"
- silent moose
There's an app for that
Grand Theft Auto 5 release date delayed to September 17
"The chicken will lay its egg when ready. Not a second earlier, not a second later."
Then the chicken's made into a Cluckin' Bell chicken sandwich, presumably
Rubin reflects on 'a sea of bad decisions' at THQ
"uDraw - That's the steak through the heart for THQ."
Mmmmm, what a tasty way to die
Lego City Undercover limited edition revealed
"I think this game will get a hold of me and won't lego."
The most predictable joke of the week, ladies and gents
BioWare asks fans: 'Should Mass Effect 4 be a prequel?'
"Wow, they really had the crap scared out of them by the 42 morons who complained about the ending, who wouldn't even be happy if the ending came with a free winning lottery ticket delivered by a f*cking playboy bunny. In entertainment media you only ever really hear from the minority who are unhappy and you usually don't think to weigh them against the millions who are happy and have nothing to complain about. Lets just hope this trend for wanting to appease the unpleaseable naysayers doesn't grow out of proportion. I'd hate to have a bunch of bored 15 year old boys with A.D.D dictating whats in the games I play. In conclusion, as has been said before, don't ask the fans and start thinking you don't know what they want. You always did without needing to ask us."
We read this while imagining an American flag wafting in the breeze while patriotic music played
Rough cut trailer for Ubisoft project Osiris leaks
"WHY WHY WHY. I want my ancient egypt game now even if it has to do with moses and s**t"
Coincidentally, that's word-for-word what the original design brief proposed